Got swimsuit anxiety?
Summer is officially here, and someone said pool party! You’ve been invited to hangout but the thought of getting into your swimsuit and walking around in front of others puts you on pins and needles. Sound familiar?
Jamaica, 2016
Swimsuit anxiety is real for many of us. It’s a hot mess combination of social anxiety and body dysmorphia rolled up into one messy, soul-sucking mental space to hang out in. It’s like looking into those carnival mirrors. You know, the ones that make you look super out of proportion and unrecognizable?! Yeah!! For some of us that’s what we see and think everyone else sees the same thing when they look at us. So it’s just easier and safer to keep covered up and avoid those situations that might require a swimsuit. But that means you’re missing out on life!!
I remember more than one girl’s trip where I felt super conscious about getting into a bathing suit with all my skin hanging out for everyone to see. Before COVID, we traveled the first week of November every year. Because I’m a recovering Type-A personality, I always packed my bag beginning halfway through October. I always had to try on my outfits including my swimsuits to make sure I didn’t get any surprises once arriving to my destination. You know, like, they don’t fit. So, I’m looking in the mirror and any hint of that sun-kissed look that I had obtained during summer was long gone. I mean long gone! I always look pasty pale white with squishy jiggly skin because the winter snacking has kicked in. That inner critic of mine has a hell of a party as I scan and make mental note of each dimple, pimple and crater I’d see. The ugly names fly everywhere! I would NEVER talk like that to a friend of mine so why do I talk that way to myself? Welp, it took some time. It’s been a journey but I no longer do!!
6 Tips to empower yourself to be kind and compassionate through that anxiety
Honor your emotions without judgment
This is key to bringing your anxiety from 100 to 10. Just honor what you’re feeling. Don’t keep it bottled up. Talk about it out loud to yourself—yes out loud to yourself. Write down what you’re feeling and why you’re feeling that way. Give yourself time to sit in the emotion but not to wallow in it then let that shit go!! Don’t be an emotion hoarder. If you have a judgement about yourself, it can be traced back to when and why that judgment was created. But, that’s another conversation.
Focus on what you can Control
One of the traps of anxiety is the tendency to focus on things that you have absolutely no control over. The fear of the unknown is debilitating. Sit down and make a list of items you can control versus those you can’t. For example, you can control wearing clothing that is flattering. You can control what you eat. You can control how active you are. You are unable to control the size of your thighs right this minute. This is an important exercise because it keeps you grounded in reality and facts versus frolicking around with emotions that want to be in charge. Those same emotions also lie to you.
Practice body gratitude
Gratitude practice has been scientifically shown to alter the way we see things. It takes us from a place of not having to a place of abundance and appreciation for what we do have. So how does body gratitude work? Remember that your body is your ally. You move through the world because you have a physical shell—your body. It’s also important to acknowledge and say thank you to your body for doing what it does. “Thank you” body for giving me feet to walk through life. My feet keep me moving and strong. I also have cute toes that allow me to wear cute toe rings! Saying these things out loud put an energy into the Universe that bounces back to you. It’s also important to honor your body by eating foods that fuel and nourish you. Check out the free download to honor and show gratitude for your body!
Stop comparing
This one is a biggie. This is a thinking error. Stop comparing yourself to others. PeriodT. Nothing positive comes from this unhealthy habit. Trust and believe I’ve had my moments of “if I could only be like” but it made me feel worse. You have to understand and realize that we all have our own separate and unique journey to bring us to where we are. No one has the same journey. You learn and grow at your own pace which means we literally look different from each other. Imagine if we all looked the same and had the same life? Same body? Same look? How boring!
Reduce social media
Sometimes you just have to go on a social media diet. Seeing how others are living and the perceptions of their “perfect life” becomes really overwhelming to see all the time. That’s where the comparing gets out of control. Social media is meant to be entertainment not a manual on how to live YOUR life. Instead, try tuning the social media out and grounding yourself. I frequently will set a timer of 15 minutes and once that alarm goes off then I exit off of social media. I’m not saying it’s easy but you can learn to tune out the world and go inwards for your validation and comforting.
Choose clothes that flatter
Knowing and dressing for your body style is an instant boost to chase the swimsuit anxiety away. There’s lots of information on the web that can be found. I’m an apple shape also known as oval or circle. Lots of fluff around the middle so I tend to wear flowy clothing that will disguise my muffin top like the one in the picture above. Once you determine your body style, use style guides to help you find clothing that you feel comfortable and confident in. Go through your closet and get rid of the clothing that you’re going to wear “someday”. The daily visual just makes us feel bad and shameful so get rid of it.
Remember…
There is no one answer or solution as you work through your swimsuit anxiety. The important thing is to get busy and not ignore it. Start the journey of working on developing body gratitude. Life is meant for living soooooo stop being mean and cruel to yourself. Start practicing self-love. Focus on what you can control and let go of the rest. The most important thing is to be healthy. Suit up and join the fun of that pool party. I’m always available for a complimentary 30-minute consultation if you want to discuss this topic in more detail. Take care!
wh
Resources:
https://centerforchange.com/
